


Love Is A Fragile Idea

by rndm_bway_reference_grl_heere



Series: DEH and BMC crap short fics [6]
Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, But then they do, But whatevs because now I have this, Don't worry, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Happy Ending, Jeremy is lonely, M/M, Michael is a sweet boy, Strangers, and a little sad, i was bored, kinda sad, they don't know each other yet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-04
Updated: 2019-01-04
Packaged: 2019-10-03 22:21:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17292524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rndm_bway_reference_grl_heere/pseuds/rndm_bway_reference_grl_heere
Summary: Jeremy always believed that love was a choice. He, being the idiot he is, chose to ignore the choice. He never wanted love, it was too much work. What he did want. though, were friends. Those, he found, were pretty difficult to come by as well.





	Love Is A Fragile Idea

**Author's Note:**

> This was literally just an entry for a writing contest at school oof... (I changed the name and stuff in the actual entry sheesh) Enjoy!

Love was always a fragile idea. 

It was more of a myth to Jeremy, even.

He never understood how it worked.

Do you just... Like a person even more or something? Appreciate someone a little more than friends? Is it just a best friend you can kiss? How does it work?

Not only was it confusing to understand, he's also heard only bad stories about it, considering where he grew up.

"Love is... hard." His dad would say, meanwhile dragging his eyes toward Jeremy's mother, face sad.

He didn't want things to be hard. He wanted life to go easy. 

Yes, he was about ten at the time, but he still knew what he wanted.

His views only got worse over the years. He saw how it destroyed his father when his mother left. He saw it leave him with what was only a slither of a man. He saw how much pain and loneliness came upon him and his father when she left. 

Love destroyed the only person he really looked up to. The one person he actually might have felt love for.

He wasn't going to let that happen to himself.

He decided he'd just never  _want_ love. It looked painful, and way too difficult. 

He figured that love was just a mere choice. A terrible choice, really.

So, he chose not to follow the path of pain and hardship. He wouldn't be a fool like his father and seek out love, only to be crushed. Not that he'd ever tell him that.

However, his father would ask Jeremy if he had a girlfriend, or even a boyfriend at times. As always, Jeremy would disappoint with a low grumble of "No, Dad," and go on with his day. 

He never wanted to disappoint his dad, God knows he's been through enough, but Jeremy knew that if he wanted to find his happiness, it wouldn't be with love.

It would be through hard work, a good job, a good university, and friends.

Unfortunately, Jeremy was quite lacking in the friends department. He was pretty awkward, clouded with anxiety, and the fact that he didn’t believe in love often drove others away. He also wore big brown glasses that he didn't need, and those covered his pale, freckled face, and he always had his hazelnut brown hair in the messiest way possible. He guarded himself up, rarely ever letting emotions slip through the walls of his mind and heart, still carefully analyzing each and every one that still managed to pass through.

So instead of friends, Jeremy drowned himself in his studies, not caring about friends or love; just moving on and excelling in all his classes. Eventually, he got into a pretty nice university, had a fairly-nice paying job, and was top of all his classes. 

He was living the life that he always wanted. It’s just that it was… bland. No excitement like he expected there to be in independence. There was no thrill of living alone, making your own decisions, or,  _ adulting _ , as they would say.

Nope. The only occasional exciting thing was either a new book, or a new student who he’s never met. Everytime a new student would come in, he’d try to get to them first, attempt to make his first real friend. 

To his dismay, his attempts would fail. They’d either be way too outgoing, or just too shy and small to talk to. He pitied the latter, for he knew what it felt like to be that person.

After about almost a year of this barely-a-life life, he considered love once more. He thought about what it would be like to have someone there for him. To make him laugh when he was sad, or someone to comfort in their bad days. Someone he could be herself with, no matter how weird. Someone he could make happy memories with, someone to have drama with. Someone to love.

Quickly realizing that he was only describing a friend in his slightly intrusive thoughts, he shooed them away before they could get worse. If he ever even found a good friend, he would consider love again, maybe even try to follow through with it.

He found that difficult with the coming year; finding that friends were particularly hard to come by when you’re a Sophomore in college. No one was really knew, so not very many chances to hop on. No friends to hope for. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t make one. 

Hopeless and lonely, he completely gave up the chance of love once more. Even finding that if you even start to  _ hope  _ for love, it comes back and still manages to hurt you. So, you could say that he gave up. He gave up trying to find any friends, he gave up trying to hide his emotions, he just gave up. And he cried. Oh, he cried many, many tears. He didn’t try to stop them, either. He let down his walls, fully vulnerable in every way, downright  _ sobbing  _ into his small, shaky hands, letting all his anger, loneliness, and sadness escape from his body. He sobbed for what seemed like  _ hours,  _ or even  _ days _ . Fortunately, he didn’t. He felt a rather warm hand on his back, rubbing slowly and gently, supposedly trying to  _ comfort  _ him; when he was dragged back to reality.

He jumped in his seat, quickly turning to see who the hand belonged to. Looking up, he met the soft eyes of a taller man, who wore big glasses that covered his tan skin, a big red hoodie on, and some big, white headphones around his neck. He had a sympathetic look in his eyes.

“Um, are you -- Are you okay, sir?” The man, who was much clearer now thanks to the lack of crying, looked… kind hearted. His voice was soft, calming. He smelled lightly of strawberries. He looked concerned for Jeremy, as if he were an actual friend. His gentle hand never stopped rubbing the same spot on Jeremy’s back as he slowly sat down next to him, slightly cautious.

Jeremy was at a lack of words. He was still recovering from his little cry-fest, and he was mostly shocked to see someone -- a stranger, even -- talking to him, trying to comfort him. Needless to say, he was speechless. He couldn’t comprehend why this absolute angel of a man would be doing this.

“I-I am n-now,” Jeremy said quietly, meaning every word.

The boy sighed, then continued with a happier tone in her voice, “Are you sure? I have the whole rest of the day off, so we can like, talk about who hurt you or somethin’!”

Jeremy sniffled once more, “I-I would like t-that a lot, a-actually.” He paused. “Name’s J-Jeremy, short for Jeremiah." He didn't exactly know how or what friends wanted to call each other, or if this  _was_ a possible chance of a friend.

The man smiled -- a kind, heartwarming smile, “Well, it’s nice to meet you, Jeremy.” He stuck out his hand and finished with, “I’m Michael! Wanna be friends? I’m kinda new here.”

Jeremy chuckled a watery laugh, “Y-Yeah… I would love to…”  _ Love _ , Jeremy thought.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay I'm bored and plEASE someone gimme a prompt or something to write...


End file.
